It depends on the situation. In most cases, you can work through it.
One of the most important things is to ask yourself if it is hurting the kids. When it hurts the kids; it is so important that you just deal with it in the best way.
We need to be sensitive to the needs of kids in and throughout the whole process and remain a family no matter what.
Triangulation- detour is when during a divorce you converse about one another to your children. This in general is not a good idea; you never want to involve your children in your marital woes.
When both parents are fighting children lose valuable resources. It is impossible for them to please both parents and they feel very torn.At times they will even use their children to fight. Tell your father this.....
The worst is that most children tend to blame themselves.
They feel like if they could have done something to change the circumstances their is a song by the artist Pink that applies to this. The song is called family portrait and i think this line perfectly illustrates the child blaming them self: Can we work it out? Can we be a family?
I promise I'll be better, Mommy I'll do anything
Can we work it out? Can we be a family?
I promise I'll be better, Daddy please don't
leave .
This shows how important it is to reassure the child that it is in no way their fault.
It is also hard for kids because they never get both parents at once and tend to lean more towards a certain parent. Their access to both has greatly decreased.
Boys tend to do worse in divorce, why would that be? I believe that is because as boys they are taught to be tough and crying is seen as a weakness whereas with girls it is okay for them to cry and they are supposed to show emotion.
In all, i think it is very hard when it comes to deciding to divorce and i think that we need to try all we can to make sure that we don't just let go and divorce. We need to work and fight for that relationship.
Which do we want?
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